I see women all the time saying how upset they are. ”My husband doesn’t appreciate all I do.” ”My husband doesn’t know half of what I do.” ”I do way more than my share and never get a break.” I have an amazing husband, but I even find myself saying these things sometimes. I decided to compile a list of things you can do to support your wife.
1) Do chores
If your wife asks you everyday to do the same thing (I.e. take out the trash or feed dogs) do them without asking. More than likely she has her hands full with a million other things. ”I need to do the laundry.” ”The kids haven’t even started their school project.” ”Did I read to the baby yet?” ”Those dishes aren’t going to clean themselves.” When she asks you to do the same things over and over, she simply can’t handle those things on her plate and needs you to take charge of them.
2) Do things you see needing to be done
If you see the dishes need doing do them. If your wife hasn’t started dinner, cook it for her. If the room needs to be sweeped, sweep it. Whether your wife stays home or works, she is busy tending your children or doing another chore. Think about this, if you didn’t have her you would need to do everything. So don’t make her do everything when she has you. She has you and should be better off with you than without.
3) Know where things are
Know where things in your home are kept. You shouldn’t have to ask where a dish goes, or where to find your kid’s socks. Your wife doesn’t need someone asking her where stuff is when she’s trying to take care of a million other things. You live there, you should be active in the household.
4) Know about upcoming events and what’s needed in the house
Your spouse is constantly making mental notes. ”We need more ketchup.” ”Birthday party next Saturday.” ”Doctors appointment Tuesday 9:00am.” Hearing, ”I didn’t know that was today” or ”I didn’t know we were out of ketchup” will drive her insane. Become more involved and attentive to the needs of your household. Grab that ketchup on the way home from work, or offer to drop your child off at the birthday party. Ask about the doctors appointment. It shows you care and are an active member of the household.
5) Spend time with your child
This is beneficial to your wife, your child, and yourself. If you only have two hours once you’re home to spend with your child before they go to bed then spend that time with them. Play with them, read to them, get to know their interests. It strengthens you and your child’s bond while giving your wife a break or time to get something done.
6) Be active in parenting your child
Similar to the above, don’t just play with your child, but parent them also. Discipline them, give advice, do an activity with them, read the Bible with them, etc.
7) Let her have girls night or me time
Your wife won’t thank you enough. Give her space and time. Whether she wants to go out for Mimosas with friends or curl up with her favorite book. While she’s taking a break take over what she normally deals with on a day to day basis. Clean, parent, cook, etc. If you’re not sure what to do ask for a list of things she’d be doing if she wasn’t taking me time.
8) Learn to speak her love language
Every person is different. We each speak a different love language. A love language is simply the kind of acts that make a person feel loved. There are five love languages: Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch. I highly suggest every couple read The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. You can find a copy here.
9) Organize date night
When was the last time you had a date night? To keep romance and your marriage alive date nights are key. Some people use a 2/2/2 rule: date night every two weeks, weekend getaway every two months, a vacation every two years. If you’re like me a weekend away from the kids may not be feasible, but you get the idea.
10) Support her ambitions
Your wife is one of your biggest supporters and cheerleaders. She needs you to be the same for her. If she wants to start a blog help her have an hour alone to work on it in the evenings. If she wants to learn a new language get her a book on it. If she wants to go back to school, help her work out childcare. She needs your support, just like she gives hers to you.
I hope this gives you ideas on how to better support your wife. Comment below thing you do to support your spouse!
The Modern Christian Mom 